Even Angels Fall ( the Return of Shadows)
by padfoot freak
Summary: A Sirius returns fic. Deep hatred for the one you love. Read and Review, and I'll send you jello.


A/N: I quite liked this story at the beginning, then I had authors block near the end. Gross, I hate having no ideas. 

Even Angels Fall (the Return of Shadows)

_I hate Sirius Black_.

It was the first thought that registered in Kaiya Blint's mind when she woke up, regardless of rain or shine, and she'd woken up to the same recurring thought every day for the last 15 years.

_No, this is deeper than hate. I detest....I loath Black._

That thought always seemed to follow the first, except this one was thought more forcefully, and thought when she was truly awake. 

"Like 7 am is actually an hour that you can be truly awake. And I'm talking to myself again." Kaiya shook her head, trying to clear her mind. It seemed like she had been trying to do this too, for the last 15 years of her life.

Kaiya stretched, and attempted to stand up. That took too much work, at this ungodly hour, and she collapsed back unto her bed. Her room, her entire apartment was dismal and bare. There were no rememberants of her past, nothing to tell of the popular, friendlyGryffindor beauty she had been years ago.

There was however one thing - a sign of friendship; a friendship so deep it didn't matter if one was gone, so deep it was painful. A framed Muggle photograph, an old one with a bent right corner, stood alone on Kaiya's bedside table. There were two girls in the picture; one had waist length auburn red hair, and magnificent emerald eyes, and the other girl's gleaming blonde hair fell just beyond her shoulders, and matched her brown eyes perfectly. Their arms were slung over the others' shoulder, and their smiles were evident from feet away. 

_ _

_"Kaiya, come on, Mum sent me a Muggle camera for Christmas! I want a picture of us!"_

_ _

_"Lily! For crying out loud, it's only 8:04 in the morning!"_

_ _

_"Get up right now, or I'll get Sirius to take the picture...Ow! Don't throw a pillow at me!"_

Kaiya almost smiled as she remembered the conversation. She finally stumbled out of bed, and made herself a cup of coffee. She sat in an overstuffed chair near a window, and started blankly out of the window, the hot mug warming her fingers. There was nothing else to do...there had been no one to do anything with since... 

Kayia found herself doing what she did everyday it seemed...staring out of the window at nothing at all, engulfed in heartbreaking memories. Memories that she wished she could relive...just once.

Around lunchtime, Kaiya found some strength, and managed to magic herself a bowl of soup. As she walked back into her dining room, she watched as a tall, very thin man appeared out of nowhere. The bowl slipped to the ground, drenching the floor in tomato soup. The man, turned, shocked into a stupor. 

"Get the _hell_ out of my house." Her voice quivered slightly, and hatred dripped from every syllable.

"Please, Kaiya, I can explain, I didn't-"

Before Sirius Black could say another word, he found himself staring down the end of a wand held by a verytemperamental woman. Sirius had been under her wand many times before, through hair colors and a brief period as a frog, but had never feared for his life before.

"I'm going to give you five seconds to disappear and never come back, or else I will not be heldresponsible for my actions." Kaiya whispered heatedly, her brown eyes blazing.

She was quite startled when Sirius dropped to his knees. "I didn't kill Lily and James."

There was a brief pause, which was only broken when Kaiya hollowly laughed. Then Sirius realized she wasn't laughing...she was crying. Kaiya had never cried before in front of...well, anyone come to think of it. It made Sirius feel worse than he already did. He was nervous as hell to being with, and now here she was crying. He felt like crying himself.

"You didn't kill them," Kaiya mockingly sneered through her tears. "I'm _not stupid_, Black," she spat. "You were their secret keeper!"

"I wasn't, Kaiya. James switched to Peter at the last moment-" Sirius started hurriedly, but Kaiya interrupted.

"Peter's dead! YOU KILLED HIM, LIKE YOU KILLED JAMES AND LILY! OUR BEST FRIENDS!" Kayia shouted.

Sirius's shining eyes were burning into her own. "Kaiya, please, just listen," Sirius choked out, bowing his head. Kaiya saw a solitary tear fall to the floor…and realized it wasn't hers. It was his.

Maybe it was the tear that made Kaiya sink to the floor beside Sirius, throwing her wand on the floor. Sirius had never, ever, ever, in her whole 24 years of knowing him, cried.It just wasn't in his nature to cry. Seeing him cry broke her down.

_"My parents were killed. By Death Eaters, those bastards. My entire family is gone, and I have no one," Kaiya told Sirius. Lily was sitting beside her, crying a bit, and trying in vain to comfort her best friend. _

_ _

_"You've got me, Kaiya. And Lily, James, Remus, Peter, and hell you've got more friends than I can name. We all love you." Sirius stuttered the last bit out, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. Kaiya remained stony faced. "You can cry, you know. I'll even cry with you, if you want me too," he said._

_ _

_"I don't cry."_

_ _

"Don't cry, Sirius.I- you.....James switched? To Peter? But you and James were best friends..." Kaiya hesitated before laying a shaking hand on Sirius's trembling fingers.

He looked up, and with obvious difficulty, looked into her eyes. "It was a bluff. Who would ever think that they'd use...that rat...for anything as important...as their lives?" Sirius shook his head in disgust. "They died because of me. I should have known... For the life of me I don't know why I didn't think it was him..." Sirius explained about tracking down Peter and Peter blowing up the street, being taken away to Azkaban, the torture of the years. He told her about Harry, the beautiful baby who'd looked just like James, down to the smile, except for his eyes. Harry had inherited Lily's emerald eyes. 

When they had talked themselves hoarse, Sirius stood, pulling Kaiya with him. And suddenly, it felt like they were sixteen years old again, and Sirius wanted to ask her to the Christmas Dance. "I've missed you...so much...Kaiya, I've loved you forever."

"Forever....forever was when we were 16 years old, and had no idea what forever meant. We can't..." she shook her head, dropping his hand. "Do you remember when we were 17 and you promised yourself to me? We were so naive, Sirius."

"Kaiya, I've had half of my life to think, and besides Harry, Quidditch, and food,you're all I think of." 

"I'm glad I rank behind Quidditch; it's such an essential part of life," she quipped sarcastically.

"Honestly, did you hear about the Quidditch World Cup? Ireland, _really_-" 

Kaiya shook her head. "You haven't changed at all."

"I tried not to."

Kaiya sighed, and plopped down on her couch. She opened a leather book, flipped through a few pages, and pointed at a picture. "Do you remember this?" Sirius sat beside her, staring silently at the picture, a half smile on his face.

"Of course. How could I forget?" It was a wizard photograph, and in it were Sirius,Kaiya, Lily, James, and Remus Lupin in all their glory, tongues out, in a many armed hug. Lily was sitting on James's lap, her arm around Kaiya, who was squishing Sirius, with Remus popping up between the two girls, and knocking James on the head. "One of the best day's of my life."

They continued to look, laugh, and even sniffle at pictures, wizard and muggle, until the sun faded so much that the pictures could only be seen by the few wisp of gold that came from the windows. 

"You should go, Sirius, before it gets too late."

"I just want to stay here, and get caught snogging with you."

Kaiya almost blushed. "Nothing like a direct hit."

"Thought I'd try," Sirius shrugged.

She grasped Sirius, pressing her face into his shirt, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, trying to keep the feel of him in her mind. Sirius responded, hugging her tightly, kissing her gently on her forehead. 

She let him go slowly. "Owl me, sometime, okay? And...and come see me Sirius. I...I-yeah." She attempted a half hearted smile.

"I love you, Kaiya." And with one, lasting squeeze of her hand, he walked out of the door.

Kaiya fell asleep, as she did many nights, with one thought occupying her mind.

_I love Sirius Black_.

So? Tell me what you think. Remember, there is Jello involved! 


End file.
